Select Page

ALL THE HORRIBLE THINGS I’VE DONE

Because of the media's nasty habit of unearthing a person's irrelevant but sordid past after they've gained global attention, I've decided to beat them to the punch and "control the narrative" by publicly confessing my transgressions now so that I can't be painted in...

read more

SHUT UP

Yesterday. Yesterday was rough. -- A video out of Anaheim surfaced, showing a grown ass white man dragging a Latino teen across a yard and firing a gun into a group of kids. -- Making the first of what is sure to be many moves against the LGBTQ community, #45 removed...

read more

SECRET LOVERS (YEAH, THAT”S WHAT WE ARE)

Atlantic Starr's 1985 hit Secret Lovers popped up in my playlist during this morning's subway commute. (Leave me alone; I'm old.) For those too young to recall, Secret Lovers is an R&B ballad that completely romanticizes being in an extra marital affair. As the...

read more

MISSING

I had a delicious dinner and lavish cocktails with a former colleague this evening in the West Village. Before we parted at the West 4th subway station she said, "Oh, I forgot! I need to buy food for my parakeet!" She gingerly tugged my arm and I followed her into a...

read more

I BELIEVE THE CHILDREN ARE THE FUTURE

Last fall, my ten year old nephew got in trouble at his school for encouraging a Hispanic student to warn his parents against voting for Trumplethinskin. "Tell them that if they vote for him he'll probably just turn around and deport your whole family," he said. The...

read more

WHITNEY!

That magically irresistible stage presence! The glitzy, glittery gowns! Those bright, piercing eyes! That vibrant, legendary smile! The signature chin quiver! AND THAT VOICE! Of course, I'm referring to the one and only Whitney Houston. She has, undeniably, touched us...

read more

THAT TIME I PLANNED A WEDDING FROM ACROSS THE OCEAN

A wedding that I planned is happening this evening. Yesterday, I met the couple for the very first time. You might be wondering how it's possible to plan a wedding and not meet the bride and groom until a day before the wedding, right? The bride and groom reside in...

read more

THAT TIME I DATED A GUY WHO TRIED TO GASLIGHT ME

Years ago, I dated this dude who was cheating on me. He never, ever admitted it but all the evidence was there: salacious text messages from random guys, weird 3AM phone calls, he'd disappear for hours at a time, and there were mysterious glasses of water on the...

read more

THAT TIME I LIED ABOUT MY REPORT CARD

I lied to my parents about my 7th grade report card. I earned A's and B's in all of my classes except one. In Math, I received an F. The damn, evil F glaringly stood out on my report card, looking like a giant, jagged double-pronged fork. I hated math. It was so...

read more