Guys In Their Early 20’s: “Tyler! Wyd, wyd, omg, daddy! lol, wyd, take me on a date, meme, lol, buy me new shoes, lol, wyd, I like older guys, lol, giggle, meme, wyd, pay my rent, lol, daddy, daddy, daddy, wyd, lol, wyd, wyd, wyd, who’s this Madonna woman?”
Guys In Their Late 20’s: “Hey, Tyler, you seem really cool and I’d like to get to know you better. Our age difference isn’t an issue for me, so how about dinner on Saturday night? Oh, and by the way, do you like to parTy?”
Guys In Their 30’s: “Tyler, I think you’re really special and I’d love to spend some time with you. Let’s grab a drink or maybe some fro-yo, or let’s maybe cuddle up with some Netflix and make out. Oh, and by the way, you can’t tell anyone because I already have a boyfriend.”
Guys My Age: “Tyler, I’m ready to settle down and I really want a serious relationship but I can’t date men who don’t live in Manhattan, men who aren’t vegans, dudes who don’t own a car, guys without abs, guys with weird chest hair patterns, guys who drink too much, guys who are in AA, dudes who don’t believe in monogamy, unemployed men, men who work in retail, guys who snore, guys who don’t like open relationships, men who have roommates, guys who are obsessed with Beyoncé, Britney, Madonna, Mariah or Cher, versatile guys, guys who don’t like to cook, men who don’t make a six figure salary, flight attendants, massage therapists, Instagram celebrities, cigarette smokers, muscle mary’s, gym juicers, scene queens, drag queens, stoners, strippers, bisexuals, bartenders, tweakers, preachers, teachers, writers and actors.
Guys Who Don’t Live Anywhere Near NYC: “Tyler, you’re perfect for me. Can we get married?”