Recent Articles

I’M NOT FOR EVERYONE

Filed in Deep Shit by on April 29, 2015 0 Comments
I’M NOT FOR EVERYONE

I’m not for everyone. I’m a complex dude. Sometimes I don’t make sense. Sometimes I contradict myself. Sometimes I say I want one thing but behave like I want something else. Sometimes I make mistakes. Really big ones, too. Sometimes I’m funny and sometimes my humor is misunderstood. Sometimes I lie. Not with malicious intent. […]

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COUSIN ARIE

Filed in Family by on April 19, 2015 0 Comments
COUSIN ARIE

My cousin Arie W. Lackey was born on Sunday, May 27th, 1990. It was the same day as the Indianapolis 500 and, having been born into a family of racing fanatics, he was named after the racecar driver who won the race that year, a Dutchman named Arie Luyendyk. I was just ending my junior […]

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DEAR VODKA

Filed in Booze & Booty Calls by on April 6, 2015 0 Comments
DEAR VODKA

Dear Vodka, Whether we are keeping it mellow on a hazy summer day with our juicy friend named Cranberry or pulling an all-nighter at the club with our rowdy pal named Red Bull, we’ve had so much fun together. I can throw you in a cheap and tawdry red plastic cup for a house party […]

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A FLAWLESS SATURDAY

Filed in New York City by on March 31, 2015 0 Comments
A FLAWLESS SATURDAY

On Saturday afternoon, I accidentally walked in on my new roommate in the bathroom. I had just finished my second vodka and Bai gimbo pink grapefruit cocktail and I had to pee so bad that my back teeth were floating. I flung open the bathroom door and there he was, naked, sitting backwards on the […]

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OLD FASHIONED TYLER

Filed in Deep Shit by on March 18, 2015 0 Comments
OLD FASHIONED TYLER

I have the Kindle app on my iPhone and I own one of those Nook thingies, but I rarely use them. I still prefer to read actual physical books (and this is just one corner of my bedroom.) There’s something satisfying about holding a book. The weight in my hands. The slick, glossy cover. The […]

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