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MELANIA, THE ENABLER

I CAN'T STAND when someone compliments Melania Trump. I get SO heated. Especially when it's a gay dude praising her for her fashion choices. Fuck her fashion choices! Stop normalizing Melania as some sort of iconic glamour queen. Stop portraying her as some sort of...

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LESSON LOST

I had a more-than-decent childhood. My parents did the best they could. They tirelessly worked long and late hours. When I was a wee tot, my dad filled vending machines in factory break rooms. My mom was a grocery store cashier. They saved money when they could and...

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#45 CAN KISS IT

I'm infuriated. I'm fed up. I've fucking had enough.  Yesterday, #45 pulled our country out of the Paris climate accord, making us one of three counties no longer participating in efforts to conserve our natural resources and protect our planet. Why? Because he...

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THE HEADPIECE

TRUE STORY: One time, a bride I was working with rush-ordered a fabulous head piece that she wanted to wear for her wedding. It was an expensive, elaborate headpiece encrusted with jewels and crystals and all kinds of super fancy shiny shit. She had been looking all...

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EMILY KING & I

I was sprawled out on my ex-boyfriend's sofa the first time I heard Emily King sing. Well, I *thought* he was my boyfriend. Have you ever dated someone and you thought it was one thing and you thought *they* thought it was the same thing, but, really, they were...

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A CONVERSATION WITH QUINDON TARVER

At just 13 years old, Quindon Tarver had two hit singles that were featured on a multi-platinum selling film soundtrack. That film was the 1996 Hollywood blockbuster Romeo + Juliet, and the singles included a cover of Prince's "When Dove's Cry" and the stirring...

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THE SEARCH FOR BISCUITS AND GRAVY: BODEGA BUFFET

It was the morning after a hellacious night out filled with countless martini’s that I found myself in one of those mega-bodegas. You know, those super fancy bodegas with gigantic buffets and massive deli counters? In search of something to settle my vodka-soaked...

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CRANKY DADDY & MISS SPANDEX

While waiting to cross Hudson Street in the West Village, I heard someone behind me and turned to see a woman adorned in head-to-toe purple and hot pink spandex, with her hair sloppily pulled into pigtails. I smiled. She smiled back. "It's good that you're self aware...

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HOW TO NOT BE A BRIDZILLA (OR A GROOMOSAURUS REX)

The dee-jay hasn’t responded to your email, your mother-in-law keeps nagging you about your floral selections, and now the caterer wants to charge five more dollars per person just for baskets of bread! You want to lose five more pounds so your dress looks perfect on...

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MOUNTAIN MAN

Sometimes, I get so tired of crowded subways, overpriced martinis, and guy's who look nothing like their Scruff photos. I get so annoyed with things like pants, bossy think pieces, and people who fake gluten allergies. It's enough to make me want to leave New York and...

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