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YOUNG JAWNS AND MAN BUNS

Filed in Growing Up by on May 20, 2015 0 Comments
YOUNG JAWNS AND MAN BUNS

I don’t remember this photograph being taken. In fact, I have no idea where I was or what was happening. I know that dude, yes, but not well enough to ask him where we were without feeling like a buffoon. I found this photo on my phone. I apparently even took the time to throw […]

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BLISTERS AND DUCT TAPE

Filed in General by on May 16, 2015 0 Comments
BLISTERS AND DUCT TAPE

When Phillip​ was packing for his big move to San Francisco, he gave me a pair of Kenneth Cole boots that he no longer wanted. I tried them on and they were a smidge tight but I was like, “Whatever, I’ll make them work.” On Thursday, I had an important networking function to attend after […]

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I’M NOT FOR EVERYONE

Filed in Deep Shit by on April 29, 2015 0 Comments
I’M NOT FOR EVERYONE

I’m not for everyone. I’m a complex dude. Sometimes I don’t make sense. Sometimes I contradict myself. Sometimes I say I want one thing but behave like I want something else. Sometimes I make mistakes. Really big ones, too. Sometimes I’m funny and sometimes my humor is misunderstood. Sometimes I lie. Not with malicious intent. […]

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COUSIN ARIE

Filed in Family by on April 19, 2015 0 Comments
COUSIN ARIE

My cousin Arie W. Lackey was born on Sunday, May 27th, 1990. It was the same day as the Indianapolis 500 and, having been born into a family of racing fanatics, he was named after the racecar driver who won the race that year, a Dutchman named Arie Luyendyk. I was just ending my junior […]

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DEAR VODKA

Filed in Booze & Booty Calls by on April 6, 2015 0 Comments
DEAR VODKA

Dear Vodka, Whether we are keeping it mellow on a hazy summer day with our juicy friend named Cranberry or pulling an all-nighter at the club with our rowdy pal named Red Bull, we’ve had so much fun together. I can throw you in a cheap and tawdry red plastic cup for a house party […]

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