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THIS IS AN IMMATURE BLOG POST

I’m not an angry person. I’m not confrontational. I loathe arguments. I prefer serenity. I enjoy harmony. I strive for peace. But not today. Today, I’m on a warpath. This morning, when a bicyclist spastically swerved into the crosswalk and nearly... read more

#PANTLESSPERISCOPE WITH JACOB!

It’s time for Episode 16 of my #PantlessPeriscope show! The shows have been rather heavy the last couple of weeks. Hell, last week, I even broke down in tears. So Oprah of me, right? This week, my pal Jacob will be stopping by to help lighten the mood.... read more

HAPPY SIBLINGS DAY, BRENEN!

I could be sad that my brother isn’t around to pester and tease on National Siblings Day, but I can’t help smile when I see this photo of us hamming it up for the camera. Brenen and I were both major goofballs and we loved making other folks laugh with our... read more

A FAREWELL TO LOLA

In 2002, I adopted a Daschund-mix puppy from a hillbilly lesbian in Rome, Georgia. At that time, I was living with my close friend Jen in a Grant Park duplex. Jen drove me to Rome in her Ford Festiva and we met the hillbilly lesbian in the parking lot of an Auto Zone... read more

THE SICKLY SINGLE MAN

I don’t mind being single. I really don’t. I love my independence. I can eat whatever I want for dinner, watch whatever I want on Netflix, make out with whoever I want, snore away the night smack-dab in the middle of the bed, and I don’t have to... read more

WHY AM I SINGLE?

Because I often write about my own dating and relationship experiences, people ask me a lot of personal questions, like “how often do you shave your head?” or “have you ever been with a woman?” or “what’s your favorite part of a... read more

THE RUN

I don’t like running on the treadmill. To me, running is the worst cardio ever and I loathe it. Whenever I run, my throbbing knees feel like they are about to snap in two and my tightening, gasping lungs fill up with air that is weirdly both hot and cold. When I do... read more

SCRUFF TRILOGY: THE UNFORTUNATE TOILET INCIDENT

The third and final Scruff date was with a handsome Ecuadorian who we’ll call Diego. He had a tattooed, muscled-up body, a naughty smile, and he could barely speak English. Diego asked me to meet him at 11pm on a Saturday night at the Eagle, so, clearly, I knew this... read more

GRANDMA BARBIE

“Barbara,” said Grandma Barbara to the car salesman. “My name is Barbara.” It was 1994, a week after I wrecked my white Pontiac LeMans, rolling it like a hard boiled egg down an old country road. After my parents refused to co-sign on a loan to... read more

SCRUFF TRILOGY: THE WEED GUY

I thought The Weed Guy was catfishing me. He was a tall, beautiful, muscled model in Harlem with a perfect smile and a washboard stomach. All of his photos appeared to be professional shots, straight from Men’s Health magazine. He talked me into giving him my phone... read more